I am exhausted and completely crushed. My groans come from an anguished heart. You know what I long for LORD; You hear my every sigh. I’m overwhelmed, swamped, submerged, beneath the heavy burden of my own guilt. My inner being is shriveled up; my self-confidence crushed. My tears are liquid words, and You can read them all. (Various versions and snippets from Psalm 38 NLT/TPT)
Some days just feel like this. One thing after another hits us hard and the best we can muster is a groan before the throne. Each of us deals with failures, crushing disappointments, fears, insecurities, anxiety…stress, ugh…now that’s a big one! Right now I’m really grateful for The Word and for fact that David had the courage to write so honestly. He was given such a gift for lyrics with poignancy.
When assaults and insults come, it’s always best to have a plan. It’s essential to remember who you are, and who you’re now not; to remember who the enemy truly is, and separate that fact from any human name and face. The battles we fight are not of this plane…and it seems especially difficult in situations when we are faced with having been repaid evil for good. We each have the propensity to want what we want and all too often we become careless of other folks around us. Thus begins the domino affect…the fall out.
There’s no strength in my bones. My wounds are foul and festering. I am bent over and brought low; all day long I go around in mourning. Those who seek my life set traps, and those who want to harm me threaten to destroy me; they plot treachery all day long. Please, LORD, don’t let them succeed; don’t allow them to rejoice over me. (Psalm 38 HCSB)
My ‘go to’ phrase has become honed thru many battles. “Trust God! Do good! Keep moving forward!”
That’s how come I ended up taking a really long walk when I was so very tempted to just lay in bed and lick my wounds. Whether they’ve been self-inflicted or not, I have an Inside Helper to comfort, advise and sustain me, a Big Brother Who loves for me to look up to Him, and a Heavenly Father Who carefully tracks and watches over everything. Below is a picture my son, Jeremy, shared with me recently of a stain glass window he saw at Our Lady of the Rosary in Greenville, SC. “A beautiful representation of our triune God”, a friend stated perfectly.
YAH in all His Glorious Three Persons never abandons me! He might go a little bit quiet sometimes but that just means I need to clean out my ears. He always comes to my aid with such perfect timing, always outside the box, and in just the way I need Him to most! Yes, there is a Balm in Gilead and it is He Who completes me!
So back to my walk again. What a precious time and gift it turned out to be! I’d like to share if you don’t mind because honestly most of us need encouragements of these kinds. Otherwise, why else would GOD have placed such sights just about everywhere our eyes might land! We’re following our Shepherd and He takes us by the hand.
Apple Watch. Check.
Sun hat and sunglasses. On.
Waist pouch. Filled with
chapstick, Kleenex, phone,
pocket money (just in case)
Sunscreen. Liberally slathered.
Walking shoes. Bow tied and ready.
Mind set. Willing to take notes and change.
Count down beginning…3-2-1.
Ready!
Even when you are chased by those who seek to kill you, your life is safe in the care of the LORD your GOD, secure in His treasure pouch! But the lives of your enemies will disappear like stones shot from a sling! 1 Samuel 25:29 NLT
Good bye for now, house! Hello, sweet sunshine! The songs of birds fill the air as my feet step over the threshold!
The air is filled with pollen, I sneeze. But golden rays of warmth touch my shoulders and neck.
Well, huh, will you look at that? It’s the new type of measure meter has been installed on our water main cover. I saw the man out here doing work on it yesterday. The surrounding tree roots have sure grown thick! I hope they run deep towards the best place for them to reach! Won’t do them or me any good to get wrapped and tangled up around a bunch of underground pipes!
Green, green, beautiful GREEN! The next pond over…such a lovely scene! Lush green pasture, a LORD of Peace…and two small alligators you might have to squint to see!
Big love, little love, hearts of chalk drawn in pink. Pink: the color that speaks of beloved, intimacy, purity, passion…witnessing!
Such a graceful climber, this clematis! Its bold color is like a cool drink of something…
…as is the gentle pastel of clusters of Wisteria climbing tall trees.
The promise of new fruit coming to bear, following winter’s harsh cold.
Cheerful dollops of color everywhere! In every place I look! More splendid than any professional bouquet! A Hand selected extravaganza of pick me up’s just when (and where) I need them the most!
I thrill over each tiny detail!
Find delight in every bold splash!
Traveling the edge of each soft petal!
Before long… what’s this?! Some free supplies found?! A handy solution for collecting some bits of trash. My sight takes in a little bit more and meandering steps become firm with direction and purpose.
What began with heartbreak ended up with a mission! I’ve had a glorious walk out of doors! What can I do to preserve it?!
Well, look what I’ve discovered now! Tiny iridescent shells scattered about…
…lined up along the edge and leading down to some water!
Using one of the fresh found bags, I collect as many as I can to carry them back home and place in a dry, arid spot. A reminder to myself about the way You work.
Thank You LORD GOD for Your patience and for undeserved favor! Thank You for changing my outlook and my day by just being Who You Are in the midst of some big and little things, the good the not so great, the unattractive and the pretty! I love you so much, Jesus! You know what else?
To some this might sound a bit wild and crazy but these pieces of tree debris now look a whole lot like mermaid tails!
Perhaps like me they’re finding some Joy while swimming in the deep! I know I have two legs and walk upon dry land so, no, I’m not delusional!
Just occasionally I can get a bit fanciful and in my spirit I hear a soft whisper saying that that’s okay with Him…because He understands…and truly love, receives, and gets us!
”The apostles said to the LORD, “Increase our faith!”
“If you have the faith the size of a mustard seed,” the LORD said, “you can say to this mulberry tree, ‘Be uprooted and planted in the sea,’ and it will obey you!” Luke 17:6 HCSB
“Deep calls to deep at the thundering sound of Your waterfalls; all Your breakers and Your waves have rolled over me. Yet the LORD will command His lovingkindness in the daytime, and in the night His song will be with me, a prayer to the God of my life. Psalm 42:7-8 AMP
Thank You, Jesus!